What causes insomnia?
By: Abdul Adheem al-Muhtadi al-Bahrani
Question: What is the reason behind insomnia and lack of sleep, and what is the treatment? If it is due to marital problems, it is enough to make one think of not getting married.
The answer: The main reasons behind this case are:
1. Physical pains
2. Problems pressing on one’s mind
3. Worry, especially about one’s job and future projects
4. Watching films of terror and libertinism
5. Reading books that incite lust and the nerves
6. Feeling guilt
7. Marital problems, as you have mentioned in your question
To treat yourself, you have to perform the following steps:
1. Perform (wudu’) ritual ablution before going to bed!
2. Recite some suras of the Holy Qur’an especially the sura of al-Hashr (59)!
3. Pray to Allah to forgive you your every sin!
4. Make planned efforts according to the orders of Allah!
5. Believe sincerely that Allah manages all affairs and He is the Generous Giver!
6. Try to be outwardly and inwardly loyal and pure!
7. Be satisfied with what Allah has granted you of wealth and your marital life!
8. Be certain that this world is transient and man’s age is short!
9. Read about the problems of others and always thank Allah for His fate!
10. Tire your body out before going to bed with, for example, sports or reading!
How can one know if someone suffers insanity?
Question: Once, a dispute took place between my wife and myself about managing our marital life and our children’s affairs. She accused me of insanity. This word, instead of making me angry, has made me ponder about myself – am I really as my wife said?Would you please show the connotation of sanity that I may understand my mentality for myself and change accordingly, or I may convince my wife that I am not as she says?
The answer: I congratulate you for this liberal spirit and I wish there were more like you in our fanatic societies. The Prophet (S), who was definitely and without a doubt on the path of truth and guidance, invited the polytheists, who were on a definite path of deviation, to an open argumentation without fanaticism or omitting the argument of the other side before showing the truth. (And most surely we or you are on a right way or in manifest error).
See how the Prophet (S) made the matter of disagreement between him and the polytheists as though unresolved between guidance and deviation. Thus, he encouraged them to begin argumentation. However, in our societies, if two Muslims (or maybe two scholars) disagree, each one of them determines that he is in the truth and his opponent is in the falsehood and each one of them turns away from the other with enmity and grudge!
Dear brother, as for your question, you should be aware that sanity has some signs, most of which begin with the following don’ts:
1. Do not be inclined to violence, revenge, or transgressing against the rights of others!
2. Do not show off in your deeds!
3. Do not like despotism!
4. Do not lie!
5. Do not be lazy to spend your life idly with no aim or productivity!
6. Do not be greedy for what other people have or envy them!
7. Do not hate others, and do not fill your heart with grudge against your opponents or whoever does you wrong!
8. Do not be selfish and think yourself better than all others!
9. Do not ignore religious beliefs throughout your life!
10. Do not disperse your mind, for then your concentration on your tasks will scatter here and there!
After that, you should feel stable in your mentality and behaviors before problems, look at life positively, become hopeful of your tomorrow, and promise those whom you are responsible for a happy future. Thus, you bring yourself and your family vitality, vigor, and constructive activity.
These signs will indicate to you that your inner complexes have disappeared, and then you will live with a pure nature that will repair the condition you live in, and then you will understand your goal in this life and the duties required from you.
Dear brother, with these points, you have to prove to your wife that you are sane and you love your family, and for the sake of your family, you are ready to tolerate all difficulties in order to continue towards your goal, regardless of whether you are in difficulty or ease.
I confirm here that your not being angry with your wife when she called you insane proves that you are mentally sound, and from this point on, you must set out towards a better sanity and mentality.
 Holy Qur’an, 34:24.
How can I control my temper?
Question: I often become so angry that I burst out against whoever and whatever is around me. I confess that I am not happy with myself when I am angry with my wife, my children, or others, but I do not know how to treat this psychological disease!
The answer: Dear brother, be sure that anger harms your health because you burn with it your physical powers and the cells of your brain and heart. You may also, because of anger, lose your family and job. Remember that most of the dead in our present time have died because of apoplexy after a case of anger and nervousness.
If you believe in this information, be sure that your case is curable and the key to the cure is in your willpower, which may be difficult to control in the beginning, but later on it will grow stronger until you will find it easy to control your anger and change your behavior.
Here are some points to help you cure yourself inshallah:
1. When angry, try to orient your thinking and senses to something besides the subject that provokes your anger!
2. Leave the place you are in when you become angry and walk to another, and do not come back to it except after forgetting the situation or when your anger disappears!
3. Assign an hour or half an hour every day for practicing exercises, swimming, or breathing deeply! It would be better for you to practice such exercises at the seashore.
4. Teach yourself to be merry through smiling, joking, and mentioning pleasant events and comments within the limits of politeness and honesty! In other words, be good-humored, lovely, and attractive!
5. Trust in the abilities of others, and do not think that they cannot achieve something!
6. Choose some wise person with whom to discuss your sufferings, entrust him with your secrets, and consult him regarding your affairs!
7. Always perform wudu’ and mention Allah with your tongue and heart and remember that you are under His accurate watch!