Asmayee and The Patient Woman
Asmayee was Mamoon's vizier. Mamoon was an evil person. Asmayee was a secretive person. He once went on a hunt and was separated from his group. Islam prohibits hunting for pleasure, but the Bani Umayya and Bani Abbas indulged in this act very frequently. They used to hunt and kill animals for pleasure. Asmayee says that when he lost track of his group and was trying to find them, he spotted a tent. He went to the tent and found a young and beautiful woman sitting there. With her permission, he too sat there. He asked for some water to quench his thirst. But she said, “I don’t have the permission of my husband!” Then she added, “I have some milk for my breakfast, which I can give you.” She gave the milk to Asmayee and he drank it. He waited in the tent for about an hour but the woman appeared restless during all that period. Then he saw a camel rider arriving near the tent. The person, dark and old, was the woman’s husband. Asmayee was surprised that the pretty damsel was married to the ugly old man.
The woman helped her husband to dismount from the camel, helped him to wash his hands and feet, and very respectfully took him into the tent and sat in front of him. The old man was very rude and ill-mannered. The more he got rude, the more polite the woman became. Ultimately the husband became so rude that Asmayee thought it better to bear the heat of the sun than sit in the comfort of the tent. He went out of the tent but the old man didn’t bother about him. Since Asmayee was a guest, the woman came to the door of the tent to bid him good-bye. Once out of the tent he mentioned to the woman that, despite her youth and beauty, she was serving her husband politely, while he continued to be rude to her. The woman said angrily, “Asmayee! I did not expect you to talk ill of my husband behind his back and try to create a rift between us!” Then she added, “I have heard a tradition of the Prophet of Islam (s) and I try to follow it. Whatever is there in the world is transient. Only the Hereafter is eternal. We have to go to our graves. We have to face the Barzakh.Our destiny is either Heaven or Hell. That is eternal! The transient things of the world, good and bad, will be over in the twinkling of an eye. I want to act on this tradition to become deserving of the Heaven. I have heard that the Prophet (s)has said: "Faith has two parts—patience during hardships and gratefulness for the Bounties.”
A Muslim must bear hardships with patience, and thank Allah for His blessings. I serve my husband and bear his rudeness with patience so that my faith becomes perfect, and it becomes my thanks to my Lord for giving me youth and beauty.”
This is a truly Islamic lady. Opposed to this, sometimes women use the foulest possible language. Even a totally mannerless person will not use such words A few days ago I had told you that husbands and wives should not insult each other. I had asked the ladies never to compare the financial status of their husbands with that of other men. The husbands too should not praise other women in comparison with their wives. Some men indiscreetly tell their wives that other women are prettier than them. This one indiscreet utterance will destroy whatever little love the wife had for the husband. As far as the husband is concerned, it is a very small sentence, but it is big enough to kill love. On the contrary, the husband should tell his wife that he has not seen anyone as pretty as her. Both the man and the woman should serve each other and pay compliments to each other. One of the situations in which lying is not Haram includes praising the looks of the wife even if she is actually ugly. Similarly the wives should also sing the praises of the manliness of their husbands. These small attentions go a long way in cementing love and affection between the couples.