How do I practice patience and control my anger?
Question: I like to be quiet and always smiling because I hate sullen people who burst into anger and frown their eyebrows until their eyes come out and their faces redden. But unfortunately, I am not truly as I would like to be. Frankly, I am one of those whom I do not like, as some poet has said, ‘I like good people but I am not from them.’ Please, guide me to the way of patience and controlling my furious anger so that I may be like those I admire and I may like myself.
The answer by Abdul Azeem al-Muhtadi al-Bahrani: It is necessary for you to be aware of the problem that provokes your nerves in order to avoid it and keep yourself away from its effects. When you face this problem, try at first to recognize its causes and then try your best to avoid it. For example, someone may become angry at something and the cause may be the heat or that he has not taken a bath for a few days. If he takes off some of his clothes or if he takes a bath or pours cool water over his body, he may not become angry or excited with every trivial excitement.
It is said that using sweet perfumes eases one’s nerves, especially the perfumes of rose, jasmine and tea rose. An angry man should associate with the beauty of nature, ponder on the sky, the sea, mountains, and trees, and lie for sometime between the kind laps of nature. He should work only to the extent his body can tolerate and should not overburden himself with what exhausts him. He must be moderate in eating and not overload his stomach.
Dear brother, I advise you to practice sportive exercises in the morning, at least the Swedish exercises. Do not forget the mention of Allah in any case, and especially when being angry. You should remember the anger of Allah towards you. You should know that Islam considers anger as a soldier of the Satan. Therefore, an angry one is the one who carries this soldier on his back and protects him. Do you want to be like that? Certainly not! Then smile even if your smile is not real!